People often complain that they are sad or they are feeling depress. But first it is important to know that what is the definition of depression… This video is part of Alvida Depression Workshop, organized by DGF (Delhi Gynecologist Forum and WOW (Well Being of Women) India…
Want to book your appointment with Swasti S Sharma, please call on: 7042321200, or visit www.lifebeforelives.com for more information…
A very kind and graceful fifty years old woman came to see me. She was elegantly dressed and spoke very softly. Her main issue was that she was overtly sensitive and always felt very low and lonely. Though she was very happily married with a very loving and caring man but it was very difficult for her to trust her husband. She had no reason to doubt him but for some strange reasons she couldn’t bring herself to trust her husband, who was a very dedicated and beautiful human being.
Once on the recliner in my therapy room and deeply regressed she started talking, “I am a man. I live in a small old house. I am very happy
with my wife and a small male baby. My wife’s brother Ratan has come to visit. I do not like Ratan as I know he is not trustworthy. But my wife trusts Ratan a lot. Ratan tells us that there is a marriage in the family and he has come to invite us for the wedding. I warn my wife that it may be trap. But when my wife vehemently insists, I and my wife leave with the child and all the money and jewelry. As we walk through a dense forest, I sense that we are being followed. Some people come from behind and attack us. My wife gets killed trying to protect our money and jewelry. I get very seriously injured and is left for dead. I realize that they are all Ratan’s men. He conspired to loot and kill us under the pretext of this marriage invitation. He leaves with all the money, jewelry and our child. I survive and wait for the revenge. I go after Ratan, who has a big house. I burn his house. Ratan and my son are not there.”
At this point she started breathing heavily and crying. It took her sometimes to become normal. After a while she again continued; “Now I am sitting by the river which passes through a vast landscape. Someone comes behind me and pushes me in the river. He is Ratan. I save myself by swimming to reach the other bank of the river. After few days I again go after Ratan and find him. I take my revenge by burning him alive but in the skirmish I also get fatally burnt and die. As I die and leave the body my worry and concern is about my child. I am concerned that who will look after him. I also feel sorry for my wife as she trusted her brother blindly but got betrayed. I feel very sad for my wife. My wife from this past life is my husband in my current life. As I die and leave the body, my thought is that I had no right to punish Ratan.”
At this point I asked her that which programming of past life is affecting things in her current life. “My wife’s brother betrayed her and killed her. My wife trusted her brother, who was a bad person. My wife is my husband in current life and this is the reason that I can’t bring myself to trust him. My fear is that in this life also similar episode may be repeated that he will trust others more than me.”
When I asked her that what was her soul trying to learn in this life, she replied “Emotional values and trust. I have realized that whatever we do affects only us. We only harm ourselves. We think that we can harm others but that’s not true. We should avoid hurting others and take the righteous path.”
When I asked her that what thought process and actions can help her heal her past life trauma, she replied, “I need to learn to trust. I need to be patient. I need to respect other’s perspective also. I need to understand that why a person is behaving and doing things in a certain way. This person may have his or her reasons to act or do things in a certain manner. I am happy that I have become aware of the reason of my trust issues with my husband. I am sure that things are going to be different from now onward”.
I am happy to share that in subsequent ‘winding up the issue’ visit, she appeared much relaxed, happy and sorted.
Only allow the thoughts; you wish to continue in your being.
While doing PLRT (past life regression therapy)with thousands of clients ever since I started my practice, many interesting observations in forms of questions or doubts keep emerging. Recently someone was curious about the interception by an evil soul during PLRT sessions. To some it may sound funny or scary but actually this is a concern in with people. I wouldn’t say that such people are ignorant or too dogmatic in their perceived beliefs but I feel that I need to write this piece to dispel such dogmas.
In the universal consciousness, SOUL IS NOT EVIL. ‘Evil’ is the thought, created by a human mind that has grown to only
know evil. The super conscious (a level of awareness also known as soul or energy) is nothing but pure dynamic energy. My Godly divine angels have been kind to help me understand and acknowledge this ‘Truth’ that in ways most beautiful. I’m no one special to know this universal truth. I’m simply blessed to be revealed this truth for the benefit of those around me.
What we focus on is what grows for us. Focus on evil, and that is what you’ll attract. Focus on ‘love’, ‘kindness’, ‘good’, ‘healing’ and ‘joyfulness’… the outcome will be just that. Be watchful of the thoughts created in you as you read these lines.
If someone has the perceptive thought of an ‘evil’ soul ; that’s what this person is allowing himself or herself to focus upon. Hold that thought right then and there. Heal that thought by giving it love, and then letting it go out of your system.
What you allow is what continues. Therefore only allow that what you wish to continue in your being…
A man came to me to understand greatest karmic influence of his past life on his marriage and his relationship with his wife. He was a young medical professional of 38. He was very polite, well-read and had wonderful communication skills. He had keen interest in spirituality. He was happily married with a ten years old daughter. The reason for which he came was that despite being married, he fell in love with a young woman of 24. His wife came to know about the affair and confronted him about the fate of the marriage. He wanted Past Life Regression Session to decide that what action he should take in regard to his marriage.
This was an unusual situation for me as a Past Life Regression Therapist. Instead of wisely analyzing his current family situation this person was seeking the validation of his act through his past life scenario. In such situation the emotions easily cloud the pattern of thinking. A premeditated thought or bias can’t be ruled out in such an overwhelming and emotionally charged chaos.
Once in my therapy room and deeply regressed he saw himself in a royal attire in a traditional Pathan turban in 1480 AD. “I am in a
hallway. One of my very close confident came and has informed me that my wife is having affair with the ruler who kidnapped her. I am having trouble in digesting the news of my wife’s infidelity, which I have been told existed even before my marrying her. My wife was in relationship with another ruler who had kidnapped her. I started the war to free her from this ruler’s captivity but what I found is shocking. My wife staged her own kidnap as she was in love with this ruler. I lost the war and got defeated. As a war prisoner it was my wife who ordered to behead me. She betrayed me to be the wife of this ruler, who is more powerful than me. The war I fought with this enemy ruler made me suffer huge loss including of my son. I fought this war to save my honour, as she was the queen of my kingdom. I lost everything in the war and got beheaded. I felt sad and betrayed as the axe came down. Even after dying I have no feeling of revenge. I feel no emotion. For me this chapter is closed and I need to move on. I feel as if I am returning home. In this life again the pain is revoked. I again feel taking revenge. I again feel like inflicting the pain on my wife to settle score of the past life. My wife is my queen from the past life. She too is reborn to suffer the pain, she inflicted upon me in the past life. It seems that it has to happen otherwise she will have to be again reborn to learn this lesson. And I too will have to be reborn again as her husband to balance the karma.” He stopped here.
Slowly I brought him back to the present moment in his present life. I felt that his mind concocted a convenient story to justify his relationship with this young woman. He wanted to get over the guilt of infidelity and his subconscious mind supplied him with a fantastic story. Even when a person is in hypnosis, the mind is so smart and strong that if a decision has already been made, the mind will supply all sorts of justifications to supplement that. Somewhere this gentleman had already decided to leave his wife and he just wanted an ‘reasonably good looking’ excuse. Through this past life regression session he provided his wife with a convenient script so she can accept her ‘fate’ to balance the past life karma. With my experience and training I strongly felt that he came for his session with a predetermined narrative.
We only lie to our own self when we lie to others. We fool only ourselves when we think we are fooling others. It’s important for my clients that they come to me as a clean slate, without a predetermined notion, if they want to be truly helped. If you have already taken a decision in regard to what you wish to do, the mind will create only those images when you will be in hypnosis. For example if an astrologer has told you that you were a powerful kind in your past life, its very likely that you will see yourself as a powerful king in the past life regression session. So it’s very important that if you really wish to experience a truly revealing past life regression session, come with an open, unbiased and premeditated mind without any expectation.
Want to experience, call on: 7042321200 between 10am to 5pm during the weekdays, to book your appointment, or visit www.lifebeforelives.com for more information.
“There is no death, only a change of worlds.” – Chief Seattle
There is a common statement that almost everyone makes when they contact me for Past Life Regression – “I want to know how I died in my previous life”. In reality, there is no death, because if we really have died at some point, how come we are still here? When I say ‘we’, I am referring to us as souls. And souls are energies. Energy never dies, it merely transforms.
Many people have been able to free themselves of their fears & phobias of this life by simply observing, understanding and accepting how and why they have been carrying them over from a past life up until now. A lot of people’s issues are resolved by just knowing and gaining an insight that we never really die.
I never do Past Life Regression in the first or second session, since it is a very intense process. The first few sessions go in only educating,
creating awareness and clearing my clients of their previously known limiting beliefs about Past Life Regression. People have a lot of excitement and curiosity sometimes. And often this excitement and curiosity becomes a hindrance and blocks them from experiencing the process completely. They come with a lot of expectations, yet they do not know what to expect from the session. It takes a few sittings to help them understand the different types of (physical) forms or karmas or lessons they might come across, based on the issue they want to resolve.
And remember, as I stated earlier too, that Past Life Regression is Not The Past Life Tourism. Instead, it is a wonderful experience, a beautiful healing process. The wisdom, enlightenment and sense of relief it brings is so precious… so relaxing… so healing. Want to experience this transformation ? Call on: 7042321200 to book your appointment between 10am to 5pm during weekdays…
Clinical Hypnotherapy and Past Life Regression Therapy have proved to being extremely successful and effective treatment to get rid of all types of Fears & Phobias, increase Self-Confidence, improve Memory, get rid on Anxieties and Insecurities, Quit Smoking, build Stronger and Better Relationship and Learn the art of Unconditional Happiness. These therapies help very successfully to dilute melancholy and restore a JOYFUL POSITIVE MINDSET by filling the mind with positive ideas. These therapies are the process of evolving your consciousness and perception. These therapies help you to increase awareness to treat a lingering physical or psychological problem.
For example, there are different levels and forms for anxiety which people experience differently. Anxiety can be a mild agitation you feel
before doing a speech or a presentation in front people or an extreme disorder that disrupts your routine and everyday life. Anxiety can be the result of a traumatic experience or event that happened in the past that made the individual fearful of it happening again. Past Life Regression & Hypnotherapy help people to deal better with everyday ‘normal’ emotional issues or Anxiety and help you in becoming stronger, happier and more positive.
Hypnotherapy helps people to remember and recollect things BETTER by improving their memory; ESPECIALLY those who are preparing for EXAMINATIONS and INTERVIEWS. With the help of Past Life Regression & Hypnotherapy you can increase your Self-Confidence. Because there are different reasons for “LACK OF CONFIDENCE”.
Now the question is: How Hypnotherapy works? In the hypnotic state of mind, a Hypnotherapist feeds positive suggestions to the subconscious mind in present tense form. The subconscious accepts them, starts believing them to be true and starts acting upon them immediately.
So, take charge of your life. Do not be bogged down by Fears & Phobias, anxieties or insecurities. Increase Self-Confidence, improve your Memory, build Stronger and Better Relationship and Learn the art of Unconditional Happiness.
Want to try the techniques of Past Life Regression & Hypnotherapy? Call on 7042321200 to book your appointment between 10 am to 5 pm during weekdays.
A young, tall and well-built American girl from California came to see me a few months back. She was good looking, confident and had thick blond hair over prominent forehead and oval face. She wanted to do the past life regression therapy as she was not able to deal with her desperation to seek continuous attention from men to feel validated and fulfilled.
Once deeply regressed in my therapy room, she saw strong flashes, one as a poor homeless woman on the street and other as a happy woman with a man. She also saw flashes of military and war. She continuously experienced different powerful flashes at the same time.
When a client experiences such varied visions at the same time, as a Past Life Regression Therapist, I know when to intervene and steer a client into the right direction. At this juncture I asked her that where she wants to pick up and start. She replied that they are all related and she needs to collate them together.
There are three different ways to connect with the past life experiences;
What you visualize or see more clearly (Visualization)
What you hear more clearly (Auditory)
What you feel more clearly (Kinesthetic)
Each individual goes through a different technique to connect with the past life, depending upon the evolution of his or her senses. It’s the expertise of a Past Life Regression Therapist to ascertain that which way would be the most suitable and rewarding for the client. I found that Angel was more on the feeling and visualization side as she kept saying ; I feel and see several times. She first felt and then saw things in her past life.
“My name is Helen. I am in a town square. These are war times. There are posters about war around me. I am in America. I am wearing a floral dress like in late nineteenth century era. It’s a modest and simple dress. I am a good and kind woman. I feel as if I am pregnant now.” Here she started crying. “I am not married. This pregnancy is a secret. It feels that my man died during war. Even though I am a good human being but I am looked down upon as a bad person by the society because of being unwedded and pregnant. I have taken to begging and prostitution to survive. I miscarried and lost the child. But I always maintain positivity and goodness in my heart.” Here she stopped.
After a while she moved on to the next event. “I see a wealthy and respectable person interacting with me. He laughs at me and also looks down upon me but he keeps inviting me to his house. I feel we are in a physical relationship. I feel detached from him. It feels as if he has bought me and he provides for my sustenance and services. I work as both ; his mistress as well maid. I have resigned myself to this fate as I have no choice. There is another young man in the house who works as a stable keeper and tends to the horses. This young man is very kind to me but he feels disgusted when he finds out that I have physical relations with the master, we both work for. I also feel ashamed. This young man is not aware of my compulsions and circumstances. I feel bad to be judged by him like this. My physical relationship with my master is strange. Though at times I enjoy it but by and large I feel no emotion or interest in it. For me it’s sort of a duty. My master took me as his mistress and maid as he is wealthy and powerful and could exuberate his influence over a homeless and pregnant woman like me. I have no option but to play a tool in his life.”
Here I asked her to move to the next event of her life.
“I have grown old. I have not found any love in this life. I had no child after my miscarriage. I am in a house. This feels my own home. I am waiting to die. There are people who love me and take care of me. They feel like a family. They are the family which I have created through my empathy and goodness. It feels as if I have found caring people in my life. I do not know if they are related to me but I feel they are kind and loving towards me. I feel lot of gratitude and love for these people. They accepted me as I was. But it still is a lonely life. I had no romantic connection in this life, for which I longed a lot. I had a brief romance in my youth with the man who died in the war. It was a modest life but I still found a way to enjoy it. Though I was a very able person but there was a huge void in my life, which I found difficult to overcome. I died with a deep desire to find someone who could be my true love. Dying was a relief as it ended my sadness.”
Here when I asked her to move out of the body, her language changed from ‘I feel’ to ‘I see’. “I have left the body. Now I see people crying for me. This life has been devoid of trust and love. I had been trying to please others without caring for my preferences as my sustenance depended on that behaviour. I had been trying to make others happy without caring for my own happiness.”
From here I steered her to higher mind analysis and asked her that what fear she is carrying from that life. “I will never find the love I want. No one will see me as who I am and love me that way.”
I asked her that what was the programming from that fear?
“I believe that sex is the only way to seek attention and validation from a person even if it’s an emotionless and empty act for me. I have started believing that I wouldn’t find love. I have become an impatient person when it’s about seeking true love.”
Here I asked her that what her soul is trying to tell her.
“I am inherently as pure and lovable as I was. I feel that I can now let go of those self-limiting beliefs. If I wrongly choose to believe that I am undeserving for love and allow myself to be used by other people, then outcome will be as it was in my past life. My soul is trying to teach me that I can change my self and stop that pattern. I am lovable and not an object of pleasure for someone. I need to believe that. From now onwards I will be more cautious before giving myself into a new relationship.”
Slowly I brought her back to present life and current times. Her shining face beamed with new and joyful confidence as she gave me a big smile and hugged me tight.
Want to experience Past Life Regression, call on 7042321200 to book your appointment with Swasti S Sharma during weekdays between 10 am to 6 pm, or visit www.lifebeforelives.com to know more.
Hypnotherapy and Past Life Regression Therapy help to sort life
Physical traumas are easy to heal but not the emotional ones. When we trust someone completely and find out that the other person has played with our emotions, it gives a scar which may remain unhealed till we address it. Hypnotherapy and Past Life Regression Therapies help to heal the emotional traumas very effectively.
There is no dearth of people who play with other’s emotions brazenly and heartlessly. For them the priority is their own insecure self, which
constantly needs approval and affirmation from others. Their precariousness makes them relate and cling to different individuals for numerous flaws in their own personality. Hypnotherapy and Past Life Regression Therapies help you to develop clarity to understand such people and deal with them in a balanced way.
Life is loaded with different paradoxes. Nature brings us to face many complexities including people and situations. Most people live and interact in this world keeping their own survival in mind. It’s natural since we genetically inherit the instinct to survive at all costs. But problem begins when we start exploiting and maneuvering others to feed our own insecurity. This is utterly selfish and unproductive. People forget that in this vast universe even our whole planet’s existence is smaller than a drop of water in the ocean. Now contemplate and try to find yourself in this whole universal setup. But in our mind its only ‘I’ ‘me’ and mine which keeps projecting all the time. This is the illusion which surrounds us and encapsulates us all the time and doesn’t allow us to think clearly and see the world as it is. We always see it from our own perspective or ‘illusory’ vision.
In my therapy center I daily meet men and women from all age group who underwent painful ordeals through emotional manipulations and had been silently suffering. With the help of Hypnotherapy and Past Life Regression Therapies, they had been healed and started living a joyful life again.
Call now at 70-42-32-1200 for a Hypnotherapy / Past Life Regression Therapy session or visit www.lifebeforelives.com to know more.
“I don’t know why I am always in conflict with my husband and my mother in law, ever since I got married. I am now married for seventeen years but I have never felt comfortable or happy in my marriage. I have two wonderful daughters and have no financial or any other problem. My husband is a nice person but I don’t know why I feel hostile towards him. I can’t breathe till he is in my site. My mother in law is also very caring and loving but still I always feel unexplained anger towards her too. I want to resolve it at any cost as now it has started disturbing me very much”.
The forty-year-old elegant and well dressed woman of petite built and average height, who lived in the USA, was visiting India to be with her parents, was sitting in my therapy room. She was beautiful, had a very charming smile and spoke very impressively about her issues. She was very genuinely concerned about her unprovoked hostility towards her husband and mother in law, despite their being very kind and sweet.
Once deeply regressed to a life concerning the issue, she started speaking, “I am standing in front of a big fort. Its dark everywhere around. Its night time. I am a man. I am guarding this fort. I am wearing leather slippers, yellow bottoms and brown ‘angarakha’ (traditional Rajasthani dress). I am wearing a pagri, (traditional Rajasthani head gear) have big mustache and a sword in my belt. A woman is on the window and looking down at something. She is wearing expensive jewelry of expensive jewels and pearls and royal attire. Though her face is covered yet I can see a large round nose pin. She is looking down. She is the queen mother. It appears that I am somewhere in Rajputana. I am on the night duty guarding the royal palace. I turn around and see an impenetrable huge mountain just opposite the fort.”
Here she stopped and became silent. I asked her that what is happening. She remained quiet for few moments and then moved on to the next event and started speaking again.
“I see someone running out of a narrow passage leading to the adjacent village on my right. I challenge and stop him. He is shivering with fear. I ask him who he is. He is hesitating to tell the truth. I warn that I will kill him if doesn’t reveal that what he is doing there in the middle of the night. He is telling me that he has been sent by someone to burn the village and he had already started the fire in the village and now running away. I start beating him and pin him down to either reveal the name of the person who sent him or get killed. When I raise my sword to kill him he tells me that Madhav, the prince, want to crush a mutiny in the village and ordered him to burn the village. At the same time I see the mother queen and the prince Madhav coming out of the palace. Now I recognize their faces. The queen is my mother in law and the prince is my husband in this life. In this life also they are in mother and son relationship. I want to kill the man since he has started the fire in the village. The queen mother is stopping me to do that. She tells me that this man was lying. Madhav has nothing to so with the burning of village and only king will take the decision about the punishment. The queen mother orders me to let go of the person. I obey her. The queen mother turns around, looks at the prince and smiles in a very vicious way. Now I know that she is shielding the culprit. I don’t like this.” Here she stopped again and started breathing very heavily with a frown. After few moments she again started speaking.
“The culprit has been released. He walks away free without any punishment. The village has already burning. I am very angry. I drop down and start crying. I don’t want to serve any more. I feel helpless and suffocated. The village is in a big fire. I get up and ride my horse and rush with others to douse the fire. Women and kids are screaming. We start fetching water from the well and start controlling the inferno. There is so much smoke and smell of burning of flesh”. Here she stopped and started coughing and crying as if choked by the smoke. I reassured her and calmed her down.
After few moments she again started speaking “the stench of the burning flesh is unbearable. I have covered my nose. I am helping the injured to a small old dispensary type of place. The injured are being given turmeric paste to apply on the burn wounds. When I see so much suffering and pain, I become furious and rush towards the palace. I challenge the prince and wants to kill him but I am caught. Since I had been very loyal to the king, I am not killed but thrown out of the village and ordered not to return. I start walking aimlessly. I just keep walking and walking, dejected and humiliated. I reach a village with cows, camels and a well. I see a small girl around the well and become worried that she may not fall in the well. I rush and pick up the girl in time. Her mother comes rushing out. I scold her for being careless.” Here she stopped again and her face relaxed. She also smiled a bit and started speaking again.
“I somehow settle down in this village and become sort of a caretaker of the village. I do farming. But I am still mad at the prince and want to take revenge. I want to kill him. After sometime there is famine in the village. The water well has dried up. There is a big lake not very far. I offer to help build a small canal from the lake to the village. Since I don’t know swimming, I prepare a small raft to go around the lake to explore its outflow gorge. People warn me not to do that as the current at the gorge mouth is very rapid. But before I realize I get trapped in the whirl of the rapid water flow. My raft turns and I am thrown in the water. I know that I am going to die. I get drowned and die. I see my dead body being pulled out of the water. I keep hovering above my body and witness the cremation. Finally I leave with a resolve. My resolve is not to tolerate injustice and express my opinion strongly for the right cause”.
Gradually I brought her back to her present body and current times. She slowly opened her eyes and smiled and gained her composure. After remaining silent for a while she slowly spoke “now I know the cause of such a strong resentment towards my husband and mother in law… wow… this is powerful… I am sure I am going to change my attitude henceforth… I am happy that I have been able to resolve the mystery of unprovoked anger towards both of them”.
Months later I received a mail from her from USA. She wrote that everything is changing now. She is very happy in her life and have sorted things with her husband and mother in law. And then she wrote a long paragraph, profusely thanking me for my help.
All the names and other details have been changed to respect the privacy of the client)
A young, tall, good-looking boy with long face, curly hair, deep hypnotic eyes and nervous temperament came to my therapy room for a strange issue. He had ongoing acne on face and other skin problems, which were not being helped by best dermatologists. All the specialists kept telling him that there was no reason for him to have those skin problems. They told him that he might be holding something emotional, which could be the root cause of his acne and other skin issues. He somehow had a premonition that his acne issue may be connected to a past life. His story was that his otherwise subdued acne and skin issues would aggravate as soon as he was attracted to a woman and wanted to seriously commit. This was truly bizarre.
After being deeply regressed in my therapy room he saw himself as a young adult male with dark hair and brown shoes. He was very visual and started seeing everything very clearly:
“I have a very bad skin as if something has happened to it… the skin of my arms and face appear weird… I am in a big city with wide roads and very tall buildings… there are many people around me… I am in New York in 1900… this is my most recent past life. I am wearing a suit, holding a briefcase and I am going to my work in a company in a big tower… I can feel that my skin is very bad. Though people do not notice my skin beneath my clothes but when they closely look at me they immediately notice my disgusting face. I am very shy and discreetly work behind my desk. I do not have many friends. People talk about me as if I am a weird person. I mostly keep to myself.”
Here he became silent. My serious professional training and experience doing Past Life Regression therapy for a long time, always comes to my succor for steering my clients to the right direction, when they get stuck while experiencing any past life. I guided the young man to the next important event of his life to find out that what may have caused his skin to look so bad.
“I am a young child. I am very hungry. I am screaming and crying. When my mom picks me, my father hits her hard. I start crying even more loudly. My parents are fighting. My father starts strangulating my mother. But it feels normal as if it happens every day. My father is an alcoholic. My mother is the one who earns and takes care of us. My mother does not love my father. She wants to leave him. My father is very upset with me as he feels that my mother is giving me all her attention. He knows that my mother wants to leave him because of me. So he is very frustrated. As I keep crying my father pushes my mother away and starts hitting me. I run towards the toilet and try to hide there. This happens every other day. I start crying even louder. My father rushes after me and tries to gag me. He tries to drown me in the tub in order to silent me. He is badly drunk and mad with anger. He picks up a bottle, which is an acid toilet cleaner. He opens the bottle and pours the acid on me. I feel my skin is burning. I cry more loudly with pain. He picks me and shakes me violently and tells me to stop crying. My mother is after him and is trying to stop him to cause me further harm. She picks up a big kitchen knife and stabs him in the back. He drops me and turns around and wants to chase her. He doesn’t go more than a few steps and collapses. He is now lying on the floor in the corridor. My mother comes in and starts washing me. But my burn is serious and hurting badly”
Here I noticed that he was rubbing his face and arms with painful expressions. After a few moments he again continued;
“I grow up in an orphanage. My mother dies in the prison. Now I am young. I am with a girl. We are close. We are dancing. I want to get closer to her while dancing but she pushes me away. I am in love with her but she considers me only a friend. She is holding my hand. We are in a high school dance. We go to a park holding hands. I feel that she doesn’t want me to get close to her. She is blocking her feelings for me.”
I told him to move to the next important event.
“I am in an opera. Everyone is very well dressed. People are taking their seats. I am with the same girl. It’s sort of a date with her. There is another girl with her. I do not know this girl. We take our seats. I am still in love with this girl. I am very sad. My girl doesn’t even know that. It feels as if a massive bridge has crashed inside me. She likes me but she doesn’t love me. Its dark… the show has started.” (Here I noticed that he started rhythmically tapping his feet and moving his hands as if he was listening to the live music)“it’s now interval.. .we go out… I tell her that I need to speak with her… I tell her that how I feel for her but I am not able to express myself for the fear of rejection and we start arguing… we had argued many times earlier… it feels that she doesn’t want to proceed further… I go into the washroom and see myself in the mirror…I hate the burn scars on my face… I know the reason of her not reciprocating my love. In frustration I start scratching my face with nails… I see the blood oozing out from the scratches… in anger I break the mirror… my fingers are covered with blood. I splash water on my face and run out… she sees me and runs after me. She starts crying and yelling at me. She says that she likes me but she can not be with me. I know that this all is because of my face but she is not telling me that. I am sad that if our connection is so strong then why my skin or face matters so much to her. Why she just can’t get pass that.”
Here I told him to move to the last event of this life;
“I am very old now. There are other people around. There are balloons in the room. As if it’s a birthday party. People are not sad. My daughter and grand kids are around. I am married to someone else. My ex-girl friend is also present. We remained good friends all these years. We still have a special bond. She confesses that she loved me all these years. She holds my hand and tries to assure me of her love. But I know that she couldn’t come to terms with my skin and face. I married some other woman. My wife is not around. Seems that she has already passed away. It’s a hospital room. Same night I die in my sleep. My last thoughts are that now I have a confirmation that she too loved me but I feel sad that nothing happened between us because of my face and skin.”
When I asked him that what lessons he learned in that life, he told me that he wants a connection beyond appearances. He doesn’t want any insecure feeling about his or someone else’s looks if the love is real:
“I wish to be accepted as I am even if I am imperfect. I need to learn to love my self first before anyone makes an opinion about my appearance. My skin is just a cocoon, which separates me from others. There is no reason for me or anyone else to suffer because of skin. That life was tough for me. I didn’t get what I wanted and suffered very much even though I died peacefully. In this life again when my girl friend left me, my acne problem flared up. Though I am attractive and good looking in this life but my acne problem has a huge bearing on my psyche and I again fear rejection because of that. I do not have enough confidence. I do not speak when I should. I fear taking initiatives when it comes to girls. I feel that I shouldn’t be in a relationship. I strongly believe that physical appearances should never interfere in matters of true love. After today I will stop looking for excuses and open myself for taking initiatives & loving and living life. I will accept what I am and will never be apologetic for that.”
Months later when he came for follow up sessions I found him beaming with joyful confidence. He told me that now his acne is going away and he is responding to the treatment as never before. He told me that he feels very confident and everyone around is noticing his positive attitude.